Sorry for being a busy holiday/in-between-school-semesters lady. Once again, I will use my excuse of not being a good blogger.
ANYWAYS, if you have followed my sugar free life correctly you should know that I am done with my committed fast. And you are asking, What is she up to now?
I am eating sugar.
And guess what? I feel like crap! Instantly. I had a headache the day after and the tension in my neck and shoulders has increased with every day. I am a mess. And I can already tell my energy level is dropping, while my weight is most likely gaining. (Which was -8 at the end!) Well, how much sugar have you been eating? Oh, you don’t want to know… you do? Okay. ::hangs head::
I must confess, I am not as strong as you may think I am. This is why I started this fast in the first place. I HAVE A SUGAR PROBLEM. No, seriously, I am not exaggerating in the least bit. I have been eating sugar non-stop since I broke my fast. It started when I picked up that first Russell Stovers piece of Christmas chocolate and ended in me eating the WHOLE BOX in the matter of two days. (I gave one piece to my nephew so I didn’t feel so bad about myself.) Also you should add Christmas cookie tins, Chocolate Cherrios, cheesecake and more. Those all started with a “C”. I am a sugar addict. This issue fits in with another issue I have. It’s called All Or Nothing Syndrome. (AONS) I seem to have involuntarily carried this motto with me throughout my whole life. Let me give you some examples…
I am a Christian. Though I won’t get into my beliefs and such right now, I will say this: it’s a relationship with God. What is it not, you ask? It is not a theology, a reason to pretend that I am better than anyone else or a superficial belief that is not backed up with my actions. I believe it is important to spend time reading and praying everyday. This is something that I do all or nothing. This means I am really good at keeping on top of it or it doesn’t even exist… it’s BAD.
Activities that I enjoy, I have found, either take over my whole life or get forgotten and rusty. Reading: I love to read. If I find a book I love, I will read it and do nothing else! I will ignore everything that is important and just read. The same goes with art, music, dance or any of my creative outlets. I will do them and ignore the world around me OR I will let them sit there to be forgotten and never used.
My keyboard that is under the guest room bed in my parents house... I had to search for a while to take this picture.
You see? I have an “all or nothing” problem with the things I love. I love sugar… so here are some of my thoughts/questions. I do not have any solutions just yet.
1. How an I afford to be sugar free? It is not cheap. And to be honest with you blog readers, my husband and I are not even close to rollin’ in the dough. We have to cut corners and stick tight to our budget to be able to keep up. Raising the amount that we spend on our food is not an option. We barely spend any as it is.
2. How can I have the time to be sugar free? Again with the cooking. I know, I know, but I really don’t have this part of the wife/mommy gene. I started strong with the crock potting, but in the end I would just boil sweet potatoes and eat sugar free pretzels dipped in hummus. And I am foreseeing it to be harder when school starts up again, which is MONDAY! Boooo. I agree, Boo!
3. I still want to enjoy some of my staples, but they have refined sugar in them. I am conflicted with what to do, due to my AONS. Here are my favorites: Multi Grain Cherrios, Chobani yogurt with granola, and Rold Gold Honey Wheat Braided Twists. The things I love aren’t like eating a bag of Skittles. They sound healthy, but really have refined sugar in them that makes me feel like CRAP. Cereal is my biggest issue because
I LOVE IT I AM IN LOVE WITH IT I WANT TO MARRY IT and always have. I have not found ONE that doesn’t have sugar in it.
I say these things to ask you, Me?… yes, YOU… what should I do? Do you know any good books, ideas, diets, money/cooking solutions for me? I shall forewarn you that I put minimal effort into this as far as information goes. I am not an informational reader so I probably won’t read anything you advise unless it’s super short and quick. I am in school starting Monday and the only reading I will have time for is the textbook kind. I am a gleaner. I like to take in whatever knowledge you already have, not find it myself! Lazy bum. Hey, now! Watch yourself!
Is that song stuck in your head now???
So, PLEASE. Hook a sista up with some knowledge-filled comments. If I go on like this much longer, I might start looking like the hunch back of Notre Dame.
On a lighter note, my baby girl had an amazing first Christmas! (Just in case you were wondering!) Here are some pictures filled with cuteness for you:
Having fun on her new train from her auntie
Tired out with Daddy after all the parties
Playing in the wreckage